Hello! It’s been a hot second. Honestly, I didn’t write for the past couple weeks because I didn’t have too much to say. Not because I haven’t been doing a lot because I certainly have, and there’s so much I’d love to share with you about this journey. But at the same time, I felt like I didn’t have any fleshed-out thoughts, and I don’t want to share just to share, you know? Am I making any sense?
I kind of feel very similarly about Instagram currently. I share when I get an urge to, but honestly, that happens much less often than I would think. But I just think if I’m being super crazy intuitive and purposeful in my life currently and really focusing on feeling good and following the flow, then that same mentality can extend to my personal projects and social platforms as well.
And that’s been a huge lesson for me. One that I’ve been steadily learning for the past year or so, but that’s really being nailed down right now. Time is not the issue; I have quite a bit of it currently. But I’m just being much more mindful with what I spend that time on because no part of me wants to go back to being on autopilot or just trudging through an endless to-do list day after day. Because while that can certainly be satisfying sometimes, that’s not my current season of life.
Time is so elastic and relative, too. Like you can have tons of it but fill every second with things you “have to” do, and then all of a sudden you’re booked solid and stressed out of the wazoo. I don’t want that or need that right now; I’ve kind of had enough of that in the past 6 or so years, and it’s nice to let go of all those expectations to constantly be “doing.”
So I guess that’s me saying that I feel miles away from what I described in this post, though I’m sure I’ll feel that way again.
In the past couple weeks, I’ve really just focused on being very present in every moment and appreciating each moment for exactly what it is. So I’m still planning fun events I want to go to or future trips, but I’m living fully in each moment without wondering if I am where I’m supposed to be. Because of course I am. I am doing exactly what I need to be doing, whether that be exploring a snowy mountain that is straight out of the HP movies, or sitting on my bed in my pajamas at 8pm on a Friday watching Netflix. It’s all real; it’s all valuable, and it’s all me.
A lot of study abroad honestly feels surreal. It really feels like you’ve entered a different dimension, one that has none of your usual circumstances or responsibilities or stressors. One filled with adventure and magic and spontaneity such that my soul has been craving for longer than I could possibly explain. Of course, it’s not all sunshine and rainbows. It’s not all excitement and newness and magic. Sometimes it feels downright mundane, and in those moments, I feel a strange hollowness. Because while at home I would fill those boring moments with tasks and creative projects and work, I don’t really feel the urge to do that here. Maybe because this isn’t the time for that. This isn’t the time for me to think seriously about my future or my goals, or to work toward creating something new. This isn’t the time for me to work super hard.
It IS the time for me to lean into the newness and the magic, to feel free and truly ALIVE. To meet new people and also become my own best friend again. To explore and adventure and fearlessly follow my heart wherever it takes me.
Something about being here has already changed me. I’m more impulsive, much more spontaneous, more unapologetically authentically me. It’s funny, just when you think you’ve done all your growing, life shows you just how little you really know and how far you have yet to go.
And I’m all about the learning right now. Learning about me, about others, about everything the world has to offer that I couldn’t always see in my hamster-wheel life back home.
Sometimes I have trouble taking it all in. Just internalizing that this is where I am, and this is my reality right now. It feels unreal, and yet in some ways, more real than anything I’ve experienced before coming here. Because for the first time, I feel like I have this time and space to just be fully me and go wherever my heart takes me. And for that, I am eternally grateful.
If you followed all that, you deserve some kind of reward. 😉 So here’s a little photobomb of my most recent adventures and Edinburgh moments, if you please.
In the past couple weeks, I’ve…
Visited Durham, a tiny but beautiful city in England
Leave it to me to find a “cute coffee shop” in every place I visit.
Durham also had a couple surprises up its sleeve…like the gorgeous Durham Cathedral that was actually featured in the first and second Harry Potter movies! (SHUT THE FRONT DOOR)
Took my first solo trip to explore a new city and went to Glasgow!
I will absolutely write up a day trip guide to Glasgow in the near future! But just in a few words, I LOVED IT. It’s like Edinburgh’s rougher, artsier, angstier cousin and has SO MUCH personality. I’m definitely glad I chose to study in Edinburgh because it’s way more me, but I want to go back to Glasgow for sure. Also, SO MUCH Harry Potter-ish architecture omg.
Visited Stonehaven and Dunottar Castle, which inspired the movie Brave!
It was unbelievably cold, rainy, and HAILING, but the views were definitely worth it.
Realized that peanut butter banana toast is somehow WAY BETTER when enjoyed in cute coffeeshops while people watching and drinking coffee.
Took an absolutely MAGICAL trip to the Scottish highlands to a bunch of Harry Potter filming locations
How was it looking down on the Hogwarts Express bridge on one side and the Hogwarts Lake on the other? Pretty damn unreal.
That’s it for me today, guys! I hope you enjoyed this ramble and glimpse into my travels! My prompt to you today is to do something this week that really gets you IN THE MOMENT, whether it be a spontaneous day trip or going on a mindful walk or even just baking cookies. Just challenge yourself to be fully present and to forget about all the things you “should be” doing right now. You deserve it, and you are worthy of anything that you need to feel like your best self.
Sending you all the love <3
Very beautiful scenery.
A few years back I also went on an exchange for just one semester, and I can recognize the experience of becoming more spontaneous and adventurous. For me, it was somewhat a permanent change and probably the main reason why I now live abroad.
Studying abroad is such a great experience and brings with it a ton of personal growth. Enjoy it 🙂
Marcus@strengthery recently posted…You, A Stunning Goddess? Kinobody Goddess Toning Program Review
Totally! So cool you’re now living abroad; I definitely see that as a possibility in my own future as well!