Making Aligned Choices & Becoming Who You Are Meant to Be Right Now

Day 2 of Writing Practice, here we are. I’m thinking today about consistency and routine, and about how truly, it’s the things we do on a regular basis that begin to make up who we are. Not the things we think about doing or that we did once long ago. Our identities are constantly evolving and shifting, and I think it’s important that the choices we make daily are ones that align with who we are at this moment in time. The Harry Potter quote comes to mind: “It is our choices that show who we truly are, far more than our abilities.”

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about what kind of person I am becoming in this new phase of my life. The old rules no longer apply, and I feel like the past 1.5 years has been all about trial-and-erroring my way through choices, paying attention to the ones that feel good and which ones I’m only doing out of habit or out of a desire to escape the present moment. The ones that feel good and true are signposts, guiding my path back to myself. The ones that don’t are forks in the road, opportunities to change course and to take note of what no longer feels like me. Or, to keep going anyway because sometimes that’s what’s most comfortable.

The tricky thing about growth is that there is no set destination because who you are, at each moment in time, is a moving target. Just when you figure out what makes you feel most like you, and what you’re ready to let go of completely, something shifts and you need to recalibrate once again. Maybe true growth is realizing that you’re never actually going to “get there,” but that it is the constant learning and unraveling and recalibrating that’s bringing you forward. And that maybe, the most important thing you can do to grow is to just keep paying attention.

Take note of how different choices feel in your body, both in the act of making them and immediately after. Ask yourself, is this a feeling I want to keep experiencing? Is this aligned with the person I feel called to be right now? 

I think that’s how we get out of the autopilot, robotic cycle that so many of us get stuck in when we stop recalibrating and restructuring. When we get complacent with our own growth, we sabotage the natural evolution that we are designed to experience, again and again throughout our lives. 

And I think there’s a time in all of our lives that we do get complacent. Because it feels easier or safer, and sometimes, when everything around us is changing and shifting, it’s too much to consider the possibility that we might be too. 

So what’s the solution? How do we figure out who we are and what we need, right now? How do we get the courage to try something different or let something go?

I’m starting with a list. I’m asking myself, what are the things that are currently most important to me, and what do I want to intentionally direct my time and energy toward? 

This requires some imagination because perhaps these are things I’ve never considered non-negotiables in my life before, but something in me feels alive when I imagine spending more of my time on them.

If you, too, are feeling that fuzzy lack of clarity in your life, or feel that you are living on autopilot, or recognize the tell-tale signs of complacency hiding in every corner and crevice of your day-to-day…I invite you to imagine. And make lists. And then try. 

Here’s my current, not-at-all-set-in-stone list for the things that feel most right for me to spend my time and energy on, consciously and intentionally, at this moment in time:

1. Authentic creativity, in whatever form it comes that day 
2. Loving connection with others
3. Loving connection with self 
4. Loving connection with spirit/the universe 
5. Moving + honoring my body
6. Important purposeful work that allows me to contribute my unique value
7. Joy. Anything and everything that brings joy/pleasure/aliveness to me

Love,

Nicole